Staying or Leaving: The Reasons for Staying and the Stages of Leaving
SOC 330, The Family
Missouri Western State University
Dr. Ali Kamali
Domestic violence, which is defined as violent or aggressive behavior in the home, is an issue that is becoming a rising problem among many countries across the world, in particularly the United States. Domestic violence can take many shapes and forms and can happen to anyone. Typically, it happens from one spouse to the other, but is not always the case. There have been many cases that have been reported where the female, a caretaker, or even a child is the abuser. Although that may be the case, this paper will focus on the female victims, the problems they face regarding leaving an abusive relationship, and the steps that are needed to take once out of the violent relationships.
First and foremost, the lingering question that a victim is almost always asked is, “why stay?” What seems to be a cut and dry question, the answer is not that simple for most victims. It causes one to wonder what goes on in the victim’s head causing them to stay with someone who is hurting them in such a manner.
Secondly, trying to find certain scenarios that cause the victims of domestic abuse to stay in their current situation instead of reaching out for help or leaving the household. Were there death threats made against the victim’s life or against those they love? Is there a child in the home that makes leaving difficult? Did the abuser in question emotionally ware down the victim to where she believes the abuse is her fault? These are all questions that should be considered when dealing with a victim suffering from domestic violence.
Third, once out of the abusive relationship, what stages do the victims of domestic violence relationships have to go through to make sure that they are safe? Are there certain steps to take to help them deal with the trauma they have experienced? These are questions that need to be addressed when considering the long-term effects that leaving has on the female victim.
Finally, after researching situations regarding female victims that have dealt with domestic abuse of some kind, a conclusion can be drawn that there are underlying issues that need to be addressed when considering why some victims choose to stay. This author will attempt to prove that not only are there underlying issues to why some victims stay, but there are also multiple stages that a victim must go through after leaving their abuser.